urinal etiquette and women in the military and owls (how’s that for a dangling participle?)

inspired by totalwaste‘s picture on one of his recent posts i got a couple of pics of women in uniform.
btw: if you happen to be using google image search in a public environment (eg: in the university labs) never forget to add -xxx to any and all searches especially when thay have women and/or uniform in the title.
even when safe search is on!
i have noticed that the pic i found of the cute saluting girl is titled israel8.jpg…
i wonder if totalwaste has met her?
(i’m betting he wishes he has ;)

so i walk into the urinal this morning (complete sidetrack) and out of the corner of my eye i spot a dude at the urinals standing as you would (if you were a dude at the urinals).
so i do what any normal guy in the situation does: i don’t make eye contact and head straight for the farthest urinal spot on the other side of the room.
now since its easter vac there aren’t many people on campus which means its pretty quite.
i begin to (how to put this politely?) drain the main vein, shake hands with the man, shake the snake, go for a squirt, drop a bladder-load, take a slash, paint the urinal, making a sissy, leak the lizard (take your pick), when i notice that there is no sound coming from the other side of the room.
the guy is just standing there in front of the urinal, not peeing.
maybe he got stage fright? maybe he likes the smell of urinal cakes? maybe he just likes to look at his own dick?
most disturbing.
i finished up and got out toot sweet!
(remember: if you shake it more than twice you’re playing with it!)

now that i’ve lost any female readers i guess you can have a picture of an owl.
“why an owl?” you ask: because they’re funny!
now go do something constructive and of social redeeming value.
but before you go, a free bonus picture.
the writing translates to: “attention finished charlie” according to google’s translator. and i didn’t even select german to chingrish.


2 Responses to urinal etiquette and women in the military and owls (how’s that for a dangling participle?)

  1. totalwaste says:

    as a public service, i think i’m going to organize a camera and begin taking photo’s of some of the girls on our base. makes the girl in your pic look dodgy ;)

    i’m glad to have been of service. now it’s my turn to release the valve, open the floodgates, clean the pipes, fulfil my mission in life (transportation of coffee from cups to the facilities – according to dilbert).

    i think your owl r0xx0rs. i want one too.

  2. evo.llusion says:

    i am pretty sure that we were not supposed to smile when saluting. guess they do things differently where she is.

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