want some hot coffee bruce?

update on the hot coffee front:
i forgot to mention that the hot coffee content exists in all formats of the game and that the patch merely “unlocks” it. The patch is unofficial, of course, and rockstar games is pulling the product and replacing it with the same game just with that content completely removed (as opposed to having it on the disc, just never accessed as it is now).
in the states this controversy caused it’s rating to go from a Mature rating to an Adults Only rating which means 17+ to 18+… big deal.
however iol.co.za reports that australia has banned the game completely:
“The video game can no longer be legally sold, rented, advertised or exhibited in Australia, developer Take-Two Interactive Software Inc said on Friday.”
basically australia’s X and R ratings (the adult only ones) don’t apply to games, only movies etc… so they can’t rate it X and it used to have the rating 15+ before the whole hot coffee deal.
now how inanely stoopid is this whole deal?
firstly: get a real rating system fools!
secondly: it’s a downloadable hack made by some twit with too much time on his hands (probably the same guy that made the nude lara croft patch that took the lucious (read blocky. this was tomb raider 1) tomb raider and replaced her skin (no pun intended) with a flesh coloured skin with 2 pink dots and a small brown triangle. hellishly pixilated and not at all interesting: there’re more erotic images advertising cooldrinks to kids in comicbooks). using the same logic internet explorer should have an adults only age restriction because you can view porn with it… or beds should be adult only because some people have sex on them. get a reality check.
finally: who cares? the game is about being a gangster, carjacking, killing, beating people into bloody masses and swiping their cash, breaking and entering, general theft and violence, specific theft and violence, and basically acting like a gang-banging punk-assed mo’fo. but throw in a little badly done slap and tickle and all of a sudden the game’s going to send you to hell in a handbasket while simultaniously degrading your moral fibre. by the time you’re old enough to be allowed to play this game your moral fibre should be keeping your ethical digestive tract regular and clutter free. if not then some pixilated titties are not what your real problem is.
and if you are under the required age and still playing the game: what the hell are your parents doing? slap them for me if you can wake them out of their drunken haze / crack-feulled inebriation / if you can find them because they sure as hell ain’t doing their job.
just as an aside: violence and video games – there is yet to be a convincing arguement that shows a real link between the two. in fact the most convincing argument i’ve seen seems to show that violent video games may be a cause of less violent kids.
go read this article if you haven’t already!

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